Josh came into Crown Nine last year to buy an engagement ring for his then girlfriend Lindsey, {he picked out The Constellation Rings}, and recently the pair came into the new shop to say hi and snap a few pics with me. The couple is now living in New York-- onto the next phase of their adventure together. Before they left, I picked their brains on how they met, fell in love, and what makes their relationship tick.
1// How did you meet, what was your initial impression?
J: The first time Lindsey and I met was in New Orleans in 2003, when we were both attending Tulane. She was dating my suite mate at the time, so we had a few interactions. Other than that, we didn't interact much, if at all, until we ran into each other in the National Gallery of Art Sculpture in 2009. I was waiting for a friend driving (maybe motorcycling, I don't remember) from California (I think). She was waiting for her aunt and uncle. She stood out because she had, continues to have, short hair, which I love. We realized we knew each other from somewhere and started talking.
We spent most of the rest of the night, and after our companions arrived, drinking - the Sculpture Garden served decent sangria - and arguing with each other. I know I thought she was cute and I enjoyed sparring with her, so we became friends. A few months later we started dating.
L: Josh and I first really met at Tulane University. Josh was the suite-mate of my then-boyfriend during our freshman year. I only saw him briefly during awkward bathroom moments so I don’t really consider that how we met. What I consider our actual meeting happened in Washington, DC, almost five years later when both of us were going to graduate school there (different schools). We were both at a Friday night jazz event at the Sculpture Garden on the mall. We were both waiting around for other friends/relatives to join us. Josh walked past me while I was sitting around and we immediately recognized each other but we didn't know from where. We ended up chatting and when both of our respective parties joined us we ended up going out to dinner as one big group and hanging out afterwards (everyone got a little blitzed). My initial impression of Josh was that he was incredibly opinionated and we debated about one thing or another the entire night. Which we still do on a very regular basis.
2 // What is a memorable moment from your courtship prior to getting engaged?
J: It's not real a singular moment that sticks out, but something she did for me. Last fall I decided to run a marathon for relieve a nonspecific ennui and to check an item off my bucket list. The training lasted three months and got up to 20 miles in a day. Lindsey joined me, even though it was way over what was needed for her half marathon. I have no doubt that I would have failed without her. It meant a lot to me.
L: There are many memorable moments from Josh and I’s years together but I think one that I think of very fondly, especially during the winter months, is when we were snow-bound at a house I was dog sitting at when ’snowpocalypse’ hit Washington, DC in 2010. We ended up being stuck in this house together for almost five days, which can be a little daunting to think about when you’ve only been dating someone for a few months. We shoveled a lot of snow, drank a lot of booze, cheered on the Saints as they won the Superbowl and snuggled up. I think I also spoke to his parents for the first time over the phone while intoxicated. That was interesting. Overall it was a blast and I think it brought us a lot closer together.
3 // How did you become engaged?
J: I proposed to Lindsey at McArthur-Burney Falls in May, close to the California/Oregon border. We stayed in a cabin that didn't have much beside a few mats for sleeping. We made a fire and ate and drank and I asked her then. Lindsey told me she needed to think it over, so the weekend was a little tense. She said yes a few days later, in our kitchen in San Francisco.
L: We had planned a camping trip in Northern California at the Burney-McArthur Falls State Park over Memorial Day. On our first night there, we were sitting around the campfire after eating, drinking some wine and when there was a lull in the conversation Josh popped the big question. Although we had talked about marriage before, the question certainly took me by surprise and I actually told Josh I had to think about it. (I know! How terrible of me!) After mulling it over for a few days, which I know was very difficult for Josh, and talking it over with my Mom and others, I made my decision later in the week as we were eating dinner at our kitchen table. We’re a very romantic couple, clearly.
4 // The magic ingredient is:
J: Lindsey and I think very logically, so our (real) arguments rarely last that long and we usually reach some sort of resolution. If you think of a relationship as the aggregate of rules you've jointly decided to live by, then how you arrive at these rules matters.
L: Open and honest communication about expectations, limits, needs and desires. And of course sex; plenty and often.
